Sofia to Vancouver...And Here We Are...

Here we are. In our home exactly 12 days from when we touched down in Vancouver with our two new girls. It's been tough, almost impossible, to find the time and sanity to sit down and update this blog with everything that's been going on. The past week has been just crazy but here's a brief re-cap.

I won't go into the crazy details behind the Nightmare In Frankfurt -- that consisted of Gunther and I chasing Yuli and Fana around the airport trying to pin them down for 5 minutes to just sit still and relax. For 6 hours they bounced off of every wall in Terminal B, despite several attemps to color, watch videos, etc. They were like two animals that had been let out of the cage and it was insane.

And I really can't re-live the episode of "Yuli and Fana Terrorize the Airways" Gunther and I owe about 350 people, from first class to the back of the plane a big thank you (and several drinks) for enduring the screams, shrieks and shrills for almost 9 hours (of course they slept through the landing into Vancouver). It was the most trying experience Gunther and I could have imagined. The girls were just FREAKED out...but we got through it and actually managed to meet a lot of really nice and understanding people. For this we are so grateful because it was a NIGHTMARE!

In retrospect, we should have probably stayed a bit longer in Sofia to just spend along time with them to transition time. They may have been freaked out a bit less if we had. As much as we are SO happy to be home quickly, it was a tougher way to go.

Our first week 10 days home has been been nothing short of an emotional rollercoaster, filled with love and kisses, amazing family moments and the full gamut of transitioning that is part of this whole adoptive process. The first night I spent 8 hours (of course night hours) going toe to toe with Yuli testing every boundary conceiveable in our home. After spending the last week battoning down the hatches and putting every item that a 5 year old could break, throw, eat, etc. out of arms reach...we have finally arrived at a state of calm and peace. I think that the clouds have begun to part and we can actually see the light of what's to come. I never thought that a five year old could push me to the brink like she has but it's in the past, at least for today.

The emotional duress that Gunther and I have felt over the past 12 days is probably nothing compared to what these girls are probably going through. To think they've been plucked from the only life they've ever known, limited if not absent in love, nourishing and unconditional love, into the wonderland that we consider our new home...I can't blame them for pushing the boundaries to ensure that we're the real deal.

Today -- Yuli had her first haircut and we took them down to English Bay for a hot dog (which they loved) and chased the birds, played on the beach, etc. Yesterday, we visited Daddy in his office for the first time and their amazement at standing at a floor to ceiling window on the 17th floor looking down over the city was something to witness -- they were fascinated. Actually, every new experience, the expressions on their faces are of complete wonder. What must be going through their heads.

They love being out and about, but home time is still the toughest...they continue to push the boundaries over and over and over again, especially Yuli. They are 5 after all...combined with the fact that this is all so new. They are naturally curious and interested in touching, tasting, smelling and feeling everything...and I mean everything...

Each of these girls is so unbelievably unique...you can't believe it. Here are some highlights:

Yuli crawls into bed with us every night at around 3 a.m. She puts my hair behind my ears and rubs my cheeks and then kisses me on the lips. She then falls asleep next to me.

Fana aka "chompers" shows her affection sometime with her teeth. We hope she grows out of this phase...the doctors tell us as she settles, the biting will stop. We all have the battle wounds so beware. She is already biting way, way less...unfortunately this is how she communicates sometimes when she's over-stimulated.

Yuli already has about 20 English words...she is incredibly bright and smart...sometimes too smart for her own good. Her favorite words are I Love You and Momma...which she says about 2000 times a day.

Fana likes to pull her pants down...coming through the security in Frankfurt she just ripped her pants down...and the guard in a very German accent said "i didn't ask her to do that" and blushed. Gunther and I laughed our heads off!

Yuli likes to sing Bulgarian children's folk tunes to her daddy...and she puts her hands on her hips and sways side to side or bounces on our couch as she does. Gunther is starting to sing along with her in Bulgarian.

If you touch Fana's food....she shrieks like a mad person.

Momma does the morning and is with them all day long (with some great friends to help!) and , daddy does the bath and bed...this works well for all of us big time. Every night, it's food (I've mastered Moussaka which they love), bath and they pass out in from of the fireplace with us and we carry them to bed. We'll get them used to falling asleep in their own beds eventually when we can communicate. For now, this just works.

Fana likes to sit in any kind of box or bag...suitcase, shoebox, anything she can plant her butt in.

Gunther and I have watched ABC All-Stars about 42 times but they love it and are quiet, so we love it even more.

We've had the most unbelievable help over the past 12 days from our amazing family and such great friends...I can't say enough how you all saved us from going slightly nutbar. This is the hardest thing we've ever endeavored and we know it's just going to get better with time, with the obvious trials and tribs of parenthood.

This transition process of bringing an orphan into the home is the ultimate test of patience for all involved. Now that we see the glimmer of some peace and comfort with them, I'm glad we went through it (o.k. not glad, perhaps relieved) and even happier it's somewhat behind us. They're amazing girls and the tide is turning!

I'm going to try and keep this blog updated with our progress...may it keep moving forward!

In the meantime, thank you for your blessing and support!!!

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO,

Gunther, Cheryl, Yuli, Fana (and cats, Frankie and JJ too)

Stefana the Pooh

Poor little Fana...what a little mess. The first time I watched Gunther as I was changing Fana's diaper, I heard him gag. Now he's the master - not even phased. Fana and he are such an amazing father and daughter picture. Despite ripping through about 30 diapers, she is being such a great little girl. She is developmentally around a 2 year old. She throws things, screetches, cries when she doesn't get her way, etc., etc. She will require lots of special care as it goes with her developmental delay, but she is such a sweetheart you can't believe it. It's our charming little Yuli who is proving to be quite the test for us. We feel confident that this is mostly due to all of the attention that Fana has been receiving -- she is jealous. So in her child-like mind, she thinks if she behaves badly, she'll get attention. The hard part for us is to direct her to not misbehave, with no Bulgarian language skills. It's really hard.

All Saturday afternoon, we hung out in the apartment cause it was really cold and windy outside. Fana was being her usual self...it was Yuli was being a real primadona. Holy toledo this child was really pushing our buttons. I had just one moment where I thought to myself that I have no idea what I'm doing. I was freaked out -- it all just hit me. This feeling more or less passed quickly, thanks to Gunther re-assuring me that I was doing great -- just sometimes what you need to hear.

We had dinner in and Rosi and I successfully put the girls to sleep, which I was OVERJOYED about given the gong show of the night before. I felt SO exhausted so after a bit of down time with Rosi and Gunther I went to sleep. When Gunther came in around 11, I woke up and I had no idea where I was.

Fana puked in her bed, so we were up at 2 a.m. with her and she came into our bed to calm down. After about an hour or so she fell asleep and we all slept until 8 a.m. which was AMAZING!!!

So here we are on Sunday. Fana has been given some medication for the mysterious poo-thing. The girls are asleep taking a nap and I'm here sitting in quiet listening to downtown Sofia. Tomorrow we leave at 4 a.m. for our voyage home. I hope and pray that all goes smoothly. I can't remember the last time I wanted to just get home as much as I do right this very minute.

These girls are a HANDFUL, as all children are. They are so beautiful you can't even believe it. Fana has so many hilarious quirks -- just wait until you meet her. Yuli thinks she can get you into the palm of her hand with her cute little bubbly laugh and smile. Man, she is going to a heart-breaker but I'm not even going to think about what she's like in 10+ years.

Gunther and I just need to take this day by day. This is the hardest thing I've ever done (and I'm sure G has never experienced this kind of challenge) but I'm certain it will be the most rewarding for us and for that we feel good. I think we're both running the full gamut of emotions from feeling sometimes terrified to feeling mostly proud. He is the BEST daddy to these girls (in my humble opinion) and I'm trying not to over-analyze every juncture and/or event to make it better, justify it, etc. This is a very heightened transition time for them and for all of us. We both now that this is going to be a work in progress for some time to come. Rome wasn't built in a day...

We woke up to the smells of Fana last night at around 5 a.m. and G just looked at me in the dark and made this most hilarious face. This is a CRAZY experience but there's no place we'd rather be than with this two...as a family.

Oh My God - We Have Two Kids

There is absolutely nothing at all in my or our lives that could prepare us for what we are experiencing -- from when we met the girls two days ago to where we sit right now...

Friday, October 8
We arrived at the orphanage at 3:30 and the girls were brought in -- they were full of life and smiles and as was with our first meeting -- Yuli ran into my arms and Fana ran directly to Gunther. Fana was just over the moon to see us -- laughing and so happy! She looks like a different child altogether -- her skin and her facial expressions are relaxed...no signs of the stressed tone of former Fana. For this, our deepest wishes were realized. Yuli looked beautiful...there is no shortage of cute with this child (ok, maybe until she starts acting like one -- as per below :-)

We were asked to change them into their new clothes which we did and then we signed a bunch of release documents. We said our good-byes to the staff and were more or less motioned to go. Fana took Yuli by the hand and led her out the front doors of the orphanage which was very poignant. You could see the caregivers were sad to see the girls go but they kissed them good bye and off we went back to the hotel. Family Roehlig crusing back to the hotel feeling good...

Fana LOVES cars and Yuli also likes to look out the window as well. We got back to the hotel and the four of us went upstairs to just hang out in our hotel room. We read books and the girls were just ripping around the room going through all of their new clothes, books...i think they touched every single last thing in the room! We went downstairs to meet everyone for dinner and quickly realized that having two young ones in a restaurant was going to be quite the challenge (we knew this but now it was the real thing!) Gunther and I took turns running after the girls as we tried to also spend time with the people here in Bulgaria who made all of this a reality! Somehow we managed to do it with only breaking one wine glass (Yuli)...and a major pee accident on the bathroom floor (Fana) The girls ate everything that was on the table -- and then some. It's like there whole new world has opened up and they want to touch and taste and feel everything. Everyone said to let them do this so we did...we just wanted the girls and everyone to regard this celebration and special moment. Galia and her husband gave us a beautiful package containing pictures and charms with their initials and a host of Bulgarian items. Before we knew it, it was after 10:30 and I took Yuli up to get ready for bed. Gunther followed about 30 minutes later with Fana...while everyone was still in the restaurant.

So we have the girls in their pajamas and are trying to get them into their beds...and it was at this point that the wheels came off the cart -- the girls went absolutely nuts! OK, we knew that no nap, eating sausage and everything under the sun two hours past their dinner time was going to be a recipe for disaster! It was. The girls screamed at the top of their lungs (thank goodness we were the only ones in the hotel) for an hour and ripped through the room like a couple of tornadoes. Things got thrown and by the time they actually settled down and fell asleep -- the room looked like the Rolling Stones had just partied until dawn in it sans booze bottles. Lesson learned.

The good thing is that they slept like rocks all night. Gunther and I had a beer and a glass of wine and looked at each other like "what have we got ourselves into in a kidding kind of way." We both slept really poorly -- Fana and Yuli joined us in bed at around 8 a.m. and we read books and hung out. Gunther gave them both a shower which was HILARIOUS -- these two girls LOVE WATER. We got dressed and all headed down to breakfast. FACTOID: Fana likes to eat a whole plate of just one thing and if you try and take it away from her -- out come the lungs!
After breakfast we packed up and paid our hotel bill (including 50 bucks for a broken chair) and off we headed for Sofia...as we said Ciao Yambol as we crossed the city line and we all felt a certain sense of something coming to an end really. Even Yuli said Caio Yambol and I think they both understood what was happening. They were fine for the first half an hour and then the wheels came off the cart again. They wouldn't sit in their seats and just screamed for an hour or so. It was very stressful -- complicated by the fact that Fana was now a pooing machine. We had to keep her in pull-ups to avoid accidents (we've now gone through about 20 pull-ups...so we're off to the Chemist to try and find some medicine.) so the car pretty much was very stinky and noisy. The first (or I guess second) of many, many tests of patience. They finally calmed down and we arrived into Sofia around 3 p.m. Rather than stay in a hotel we are staying in this old apartment building (circa 1940) in the heart of the city center. It's concrete walls and thick doors are PERFECT because the girls are just bouncing off the walls. This is a weird analogy but it's like two animals that are free from constraint for the first time and they're running in every different direction, thinking they can get away with anything. Thank GOD we have Rosi. Fana is still going through pull ups like mad. Actually as I write this update Fana has just crapped all over everything. She is clearly not well with all of this pooing. We're in the midst a complete shit show! More to come on rest of Satuday...in next post...and pictures too...

Random Acts of Absolute Kindness

I just wanted to add a special post to convey what Gunther and I thought was so supremely genuine and thoughtful -- from a complete and total stranger. We were sitting in the Palomino Restaurant in the International Departures lounge in Vancouver airport having my usual pre-flight glass of wine. Our server, Perdeep, was asking about our travels and we explained to him that we were heading to Sofia to pick up our new 5 year old adopted girls. We discussed the process briefly and he said to us that we were making the world a better place and was very acknowleding and kind to us as we said our goodbyes.

As I was leaving the restaurant, I heard my name called and it was Perdeep with what was presumably his tips for the day. He pulled out a 50 dollar bill and asked Gunther and I to please purchase something for the orphanage with this money -- that it was the least he could do to help make the lives of these children just a little better. Wow...what a nice man.

We are fortunate, with all of the support that G and I have received over the past three years in this crazy process. How kind of a total stranger to add to that -- with such a thoughtful (and generous) gesture. The world is made up of special people -- all over the place.

We're Here in Bulgaria!

After a long and jammed pack plane ride from Vancouver, following by a ridiculous 8 hour layover in Frankfurt airport, and a quick hop over to Sofia, we arrived safe and sound in Sofia last night. What a trip that was. The plane from Vancouver to Frankfurt was long and it just felt like we were all just on top of each other...not good at all. Gunther and I felt like zombies as we skulked around Frankfurt airport waiting for our flight to Sofia. Oh well, we got in at 11 p.m and were so wound up we didn't really get to sleep until after one. Woke up feeling pretty refreshed at around 7 a.m., and just had breakfast and some good kick ass Bulgaria espresso!

Nikolay and Rosi are picking us up at 10 a.m. and we head to Yambol directly. We're going to check into the hotel and then head directly to the orphanage to meet the girls and take them into their new life. It's going to be an emotional day...with the assorted good byes and all. We will head back to the hotel for a bit and then all to dinner with everyone.

Tonight, we put the girls to bed for the first time as our daughters. I'll be sure to capture pictures of everything when I update the blog tonight.

And We're Off on Wednesday!

Our flights are made and we're pretty much ready to go. This Wednesday afternoonat 4:35 , we leave for Sofia, through Frankfurt where we have a 6 hour delay (arg), and arrive into Sofia on Thursday night at 11 p.m. -- a 19 hour voyage! We are going to try and get a good night's sleep (yeah right) and after breakfast we head directly to Yambol to the orphange to pick up the girls. Once we arrive at the orphanage, we are going to get them dressed in their new clothes and say our good byes. Quick and hopefully not too emotional.

We'll take the girls back to our hotel and spend the afternoon together -- maybe go to the park which is right by our hotel. That evening, Gunther and I are hosting a dinner at one of the finest restaurants in Yambol for our lawyer Nikolay, Rosi, Dr. Atanasova (director) and Galia and her husband (and the four of us) to celebrate our new family. Then our final goodbye to Galia -- which is going to be so hard but we just need to keep it positive as we don't want to upset the girls. I can't imagine how sad this will be for Galia who feels such love for our girls and has done such a great job at taking care of them while we were gone. I'm sure it's a very tough aspect of working as a caregiver of children -- having to say goodbye.

We go to sleep that night for the first time as a family. Putting them to bed for the first time and looking down on them while they're sleeping is going to be amazing. Wow...

The next morning we head back to Sofia where we'll spend time visiting the city and taking the girls around to check things out. We'll take them to Happy Restaurant -- a noisy but fun place (think Earls or Fridays) to go with them. We spend the next full day in Sofia just hanging out. We'll have to get to bed kinda early as we have to wake up at 4 a.m. to head to the airport to come home! Our flight leaves at 6 a.m. and we have a 4 hour layover in Frankfurt and then leave there at 1 p.m. We get into Vancouver at 2 p.m. on Canadian Thanksgiving. I'll be so happy when the plane touches down! We will have lots of treats, toys, videos and things to keep them occupied for the flight. They'll probably just sleep for a large portion of the flight -- or at least we hope they do! We'll have some children's Gravol just in case!

So that's it...our whirlwind trip to bring them home! We'll keep the blog updated each day we're gone. As always, thanks for all of your prayers and well wishes! We can't wait to get home...